


losing my mind (wish somebody would tell me i'm fine)

by mallyrn



Series: heartaches (indefinite hiatus) [1]
Category: TOLKIEN J. R. R. - Works & Related Fandoms
Genre: Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-30
Updated: 2018-09-30
Packaged: 2019-07-20 14:19:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 312
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16139021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mallyrn/pseuds/mallyrn
Summary: a light touch on his arm brought fingon from his silent fears, and he looked up just in time to feel a pair of chapped lips meet the corner of his mouth. "i am sorry," maedhros whispered, tears forming in his dulled blue eyes. "i can't control myself - i am sinking, alone and cold, into the dark."in which love loses its way





	losing my mind (wish somebody would tell me i'm fine)

"but you don't understand - and you never will," maedhros snarled, "you're too much of a child!" his shoulders were shaking, evidence of his strong emotions, but fingon didn't notice his friend's distress. the words cut him too deeply. was that really what maedhros thought? the russet-haired elf had seen him grow and change over centuries, but if he didn't think he'd matured enough....

would maedhros ever see him as anything more than a little cousin? a silly thing to be sheltered and coddled? fingon had thought on many occasions that his heart would break, from the strain of loving such an unattainable figure. but now, he could feel the cracks forming.

a light touch on his arm brought fingon from his silent fears, and he looked up just in time to feel a pair of chapped lips meet the corner of his mouth. "i am sorry," maedhros whispered, tears forming in his dulled blue eyes. "i can't control myself - i am sinking, alone and cold, into the dark." fingon's breath caught in his throat, just from the simple contact, and maedhros's hold on his heart tightened like a noose. then maedhros leaned forward, again, and pressed a tender kiss upon the shorter elf's slightly parted lips.

fingon froze, for a moment, but the feeling of this long-awaited kiss finally got the better of him. 

 

the rest of the night was spent in a crush of tangled limbs, fingon's hands rested on maedhros's hips, while maedhros ran his fingers through fingon's untamed black locks, the silence a short-lived comfort.

 

in the morning, maedhros was gone. fingon was told that he'd disappeared into the mists, before dawn, carrying his sword and a few provisions. he knew that maedhros meant never to return. 

the cracks in his heart deepened, so he filled them in with a harder material, and resigned himself to the days ahead.

**Author's Note:**

> tumblr: @gaynienna


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